Two C strings walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get ya?" The first string says "I'll have a gin and tonic." The second string thinks for a minute, then says "I'll take a tequila sunriseJF()#$JF(#)$(@J#()$@#())!*FNIN!OBN134ufh1ui34hf9813f8h8384h981h3984h5F!##@" The first string apologizes, "You'll have to excuse my friend, he's not null-terminated."
ProgrammingCategory: Programming (75)
Java is like Alzheimer's, it starts off slow, but eventually, your memory is gone.
ProgrammingWhat do you get if you lock a monkey in a room with a typewriter for 8 hours?
A regular expression.
ProgrammingASCII silly question, get a silly ANSI.
ProgrammingA byte walks into a bar looking miserable. The bartender asks it: "What's wrong buddy?" "Parity error." it replies. "Ah that makes sense, I thought you looked a bit off."
ProgrammingThe glass is neither half-full nor half-empty, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
ProgrammingIf Bill Gates had a dime for every time Windows crashed ... Oh wait, he does.
ProgrammingWhy are modern programming languages so materialistic?
Because they are object-oriented.
Programming"We messed up the keming again guys."
Programming"Honey, go to the store and buy some eggs." "OK." "Oh and while you're there, get some milk." He never returned.
ProgrammingHow can you tell an extroverted programmer?
He looks at YOUR shoes when he's talking.
ProgrammingWhy did the programmer quit his job?
Because he didn't get arrays.
ProgrammingWhy did the Python programmer not respond to the foreign mails he got?
Because his interpreter was busy collecting garbage.
ProgrammingWhat do you call a developer who doesn't comment code?
A developer.
ProgrammingWhy does no one like SQLrillex?
He keeps dropping the database.
Programming// This line doesn't actually do anything, but the code stops working when I delete it.
ProgrammingWhy do programmers confuse Halloween and Christmas?
Because Oct 31 = Dec 25
ProgrammingHey, wanna hear a joke?
Parsing HTML with regex.
ProgrammingYour mama's so FAT she can't save files bigger than 4GB.
ProgrammingWhy is 6 afraid of 7 in hexadecimal Canada?
Because 7 8 9 A?
ProgrammingWhy did the web developer walk out of a resturant in disgust?
The seating was laid out in tables.
ProgrammingA SQL statement walks into a bar and sees two tables. It approaches, and asks "may I join you?"
ProgrammingJava and C were telling jokes. It was C's turn, so he writes something on the wall, points to it and says "Do you get the reference?" But Java didn't.
ProgrammingA programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn't.
Programming